Archive for the 'Uncategorized' Category

The Power of Being Congruent

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David
on November 18, 2008
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“The greatest lesson of life is that you are responsible for your life.” - Oprah Winfrey

Sometimes a change in behavior does not follow a change of thinking.

Have you ever been in a position where you have done something you didn’t want to do?  Perhaps you did it to please someone and then felt you had done yourself a disservice.

Or maybe you made a decision to lead a healthier lifestyle and take up running, aerobics, martial arts or yoga, but when the time came to attend a class or go to the gym you reverted to your previously conditioned bad habit.  It’s at times like these you feel a misalignment.

This state of misalignment is what is known as “incongruence.”  The behavior doesn’t match the level of desired or stated change.  Deep inside you want to act a certain way, but when the time comes you resist the inner urge and say something like, “not this time” or “maybe next time.”

This is incongruence; it is not something that success thrives on. Success requires congruence and this means alignment on all levels from purpose, right down to behavior.

Only then can affect your environment in the way you really want.  This is the process of building self-confidence – knowing that you have executed a change of mind and acted accordingly.  Being able to recognize when you are being incongruent is the first step in making your desired change happen.

The feeling of incongruence doesn’t have to stem from a major life realization – it can happen during the course of a business meeting, a sales presentation or in a conversation with a partner.  So whatever you’re doing, it pays to be able to be able to recognize feelings of incongruence.

When you take a close look at the times when you are being successful, chances are you are also feeling happy and confident.  Of course you can imagine all sorts of bad things happening if you choose to, but when you’re engaged in the act of doing something superbly well is when you’ll be at your happiest.

There is an old saying, “if you have to ask yourself if you are happy then you are probably not.”  Happiness is a state of mind, and you arrive at it through being congruent in your actions.

So now you know what comes next.  It’s time for you to Show Up, Suit Up & Step Up!

The Best is yet to come!

David Martin
505.821.0157 direct
info@empowermax.com

The Importance of Beliefs

Published
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David
on November 11, 2008
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“There can only be one solution to any problem: a change in attitude and in consciousness.” - Gregg Braden

The beliefs that we each have about ourselves, others and the way the world is have a major impact on the quality of our experience. Because of the ‘self-fulfilling prophecy effect’, beliefs influence behavior. They can support particular behavior or inhibit it.

This is why modeling beliefs is so important.

One of the simplest ways to model the beliefs of people with outstanding abilities is to ask them questions about why they do what they do. The answers they give you will be rich with insights into their beliefs and values.

There is a story of a child in Rome who spent hours watching a strange young man work intently. Finally, the boy spoke, “Signore, why are you hitting that rock?“  Michelangelo looked up from his work and answered, “Because there is an angel inside and it wants to come out.”

Beliefs will generally take one of three main forms. They can be beliefs about what things mean. For example, if you believe that life is basically a competitive struggle and then you die, you are likely to have a very different experience of life than if you believe that it is a kind of spiritual school with many rich and fulfilling lessons to offer.

Beliefs can also be about what causes what (cause and effect). And so will give rise to the rules we choose to live by. Or again, they can be beliefs about what is important and what matters most, so giving rise to our values and criteria.

In modeling out beliefs, you want to focus on those that are most relevant to and supportive of the particular skills and competencies that you are interested in. Some good questions to elicit beliefs and metaphors are:

  • Why do you do what you do?
  • What does that mean to you?
  • What would happen if you didn’t do that?
  • What is that like?  What do you compare it to?
  • What is empowering to you about this?

Once you have elicited the beliefs of your model you can begin to experiment with them for yourself. When you go beyond simple understanding and actually ‘try on a belief’ to ‘see how it fits’, the difference can be profound.

You do this by simply acting for a time as if the beliefs were true and noticing what changes when you do. One of Einstein’s core beliefs was that the universe is a friendly place. Imagine how different the world might seem if you were to act as if that were true.

  • What new actions would you take if you believe that?
  • What would you do differently?
  • What else would you be capable of?

If you realize that the only thing between you and what you want is a belief, you can begin to adopt a new one by simply acting as if it were true.

Put everything you have into everything you do, because the best is yet to come!

David Martin
505.821.0157 direct
info@empowermax.com

Learning & Unlearning

Published
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David
on November 6, 2008
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“No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change.” - Barbara DeAngelis

Although we can consciously take in only a very small amount of information the world offers us, we notice and respond to much more without being aware.  Our conscious mind is very limited and seems able to keep track of a maximum of seven variables or pieces of information at one time.

This idea was originally outlined in 1956 by the American psychologist George Miller and a classic paper called “The Magic Number Seven, Plus or Minus Two.”  These pieces of information do not have a fixed size; they can be anything from driving a car to looking in the rear view mirror.

One way we learn is by consciously mastering small pieces of behavior, and combining them into larger and larger chunks, so they become habitual and unconscious.  We formed habit, so we are free to notice other things.

So our conscious is limited to seven plus or minus two pieces of information, either from the internal world of our thoughts, or from the external world.  Our unconscious, by contrast, is all the life-giving processes of our body, although we have learned, our past experiences, and all that we might notice, but do not, in the present moment.

The unconscious is much wiser than the conscious mind.  The idea of being able to understand an infinitely complex world with a conscious mind that can only hold about seven pieces of information at once, is obviously ludicrous.

The notion of conscious and unconscious is central to this model of how we learn.  In NLP, something is conscious when it is in present moment, awareness, as this sentence is right now.  Something is unconscious when it is not in present moment awareness.

The background noises that you can hear were probably unconscious until you read the sentence.  The memory of your first sight of snow is almost certainly out of conscious awareness.  If you have ever helped a young child to learn to ride a bike, you’ll be aware of just how unconscious that skill has become in yourself.  And the process of turning your last meal into hair and toenails is likely to remain forever unconscious.

We live in a culture which believes that we do most of what we do consciously.  Yet most of what we do, and what we do best, we do unconsciously.

By learning to become a master of your unconscious mind, you’ll be come a master of your life.

The best is yet to come!

David Martin
505.821.0157 direct
info@empowermax.com

Do Something

Published
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David
on November 4, 2008
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“In the absence of clearly-defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily trivia until ultimately we become enslaved by it.” - Robert Heinlein

This is somewhat of an edited version of a previous post.  The concept is simple and especially appropriate due to today’s election here in the USA.

It matters not what side of the polling booth you are on.  People on both sides are angry, fearful, unsure, stuck and downright freakin’ out on what’s going to happen.  Regardless of the outcome this has been an historic series of events in the good ol’ US of A.

Via emails, phone calls, text messages (no you can’t have my cell number Virginia) people have been seeking guidance on what to do next.

Here’s my response to them - “Do something, do anything.”

Example - some people feel they have to get in shape before they can even go to the gym. They end up doing nothing because the situation isn’t quite right; they’re not quite ready etc.

Perfection in life is not an option. No matter how good you get at something you can always get better. Just get started.

You want to get in shape? Do 20 push ups today before you get in the shower.

You want to increase your net worth? Put money into a savings account today.

You want to earn more each month? Make another call today.

You want to increase your knowledge in a particular area? Read book on it today.

And the list goes on.

Just do something, just do anything.

Taking action begins to create momentum in the direction of your goal.   Assuming you have a goal or list of goals.

Election results notwithstanding - “Do something, do anything.”

In the mean time, put everything you have into everything you do.

Show Up, Suit Up & Step Up because the best is yet to come!

David Martin
505.821.0157 direct
info@empowermax.com

More About Gas

Published
by
David
on October 19, 2008
in Uncategorized
. 1 Comment

“Pretend that every single person you meet has a sign around his or her neck that says, ‘Make me feel important.’ Not only will you succeed in sales, you will succeed in life.” - Mary Kay Ash

“I always paid more in gas money than I used in gas,” was what the man said.  Good stuff!

Due to my shy nature (yes Virginia that’s a joke) I was on the flight into Mexico City   and I noticed that the young man sitting next to me had a funny way of speaking English.

He’s a Kiwi (New Zealand to you Virginia), currently residing in Florida and is one of the premier Wake Boarding Coaches in the world.  We spent the better part of the flight in casual conversation, that’s where I picked up the opening line of today’s broadcast.

Think about it….here is a young man from the other side of the world that has established himself as a one of the best, in an expensive sport/hobby, in supposedly “rough economic times” and his industry is experiencing a boom.

Do you wanna know why?  Wanna know his secret?  You already do.

Re-read the opening line.

When Kurt (that’s his name Virginia) said that he always paid more in gas than the gas he used, he was stating a philosophy that he has utilized to gain success on his terms.

“Do more than is required.”

“Outwork the guy next to you.”

“Expect more from yourself than you do from anyone else.”

“Do above average things and you’ll get above average results.”

“What you put in is what you get out.”

“Garbage in, garbage out.”

“Give 8 hours work for 10 hours pay.”

… and of course, “Pay more in gas than you use.”

That’s it, simple and straight forward.

Until next time, put everything you have into everything you do.  The choice is uniquely yours.

The best is yet to come!

David Martin
505.821.0157 direct
info@empowermax.com

PS - The Circle of Excellence is coming this fall, stay tuned into the Performance Zone for details. This will be a 13 week intensive study of Personal Excellence.  Send an email to me at info@empowermax.com or call my office at 505-821-0157 for a personalized view of this program, but only if you can commit to excellence and achieving your goals.

Mission Control

Published
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David
on October 14, 2008
in Uncategorized
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“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” - Dale Carnegie

Understand this; you matter. There is no one in the world like you. No one else can make the contributions that you can make. You are unique, and you have a purpose. Your goal is to define that purpose.

It’s been written that “what man fears most is not death, but insignificance.” If you see yourself as unimportant you will never succeed. Only important people succeed.

Bill Gates succeeded because he saw the power computers could bring to the business and personal world.

Bill Cosby succeeded, because his mission is to influence the greatest numbers of families.

Walt Disney succeeded, because his mission was to bring joy to others to the vehicle of animation.

A mission is what you think is important. When you do something that’s important, it gives you meaning and when you’re doing meaningful things, no one can stop you.

Successful people have a radiance about their own importance, because they are on a mission. They aren’t just making money (money is only a byproduct), they are doing great deeds.

You have a mission. Your goal is to find it.

The way to start is to make a list of things that are important for you to accomplish this year and identify the three most important. This could be the beginning of the definition of your mission.

Would you like some guidance?  Good, then go here:

Welcome to Your Better Future

And receive a 40% discount on the internationally acclaimed audio CD program “Getting Out of Your Own Way!”

Remember, the best is yet to come!

David Martin
505.821.0157 direct
info@empowermax.com

PS - The Circle of Excellence is coming this fall, stay tuned into the Performance Zone for details. This will be a 13 week course study of Personal Excellence.  Send an email to me at info@empowermax.com or call my office at 505-821-0157 for a personalized view of this program, but only if you can commit to excellence and achieving your goals.

A Little Bit About Coaching

Published
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David
on October 8, 2008
in Uncategorized
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“Not the maker of plans and promises, but rather the one who offers faithful service in small matters. This is the person who is most likely to achieve what is good and lasting.” - Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

Coaching is about change, about making changes.  A coach is a magician of change, who takes the cards you have it helps you to play your hand better or sometimes to even change the rules of the game.

Changes come from dreams of something better.  When we have achieved one dream, we look forward and dream again.  There is always the dream beyond the dream.

It’s about bringing your dreams into reality and this is what a coach does for you.  Coaching engages your imagination and at the same time, is immensely practical in the real world.  It deals with goals and achievements.

It links your world of dreaming with your world of reality.

A coach engages the habits that are holding the client back, sometimes by guerrilla warfare, sometimes by direct assault.  Coaching will change the direction of your life.  It may only be one small change at a time, but small changes add up.

Think of your life is a journey down the road.  You don’t know where you are heading, but the scenery is pleasant.  After a while you begin to see that your life is being recycled.  You see that the same thing comes around again.

Then you come to a branch in the road.  Actually, there have been branches all along the road, but you haven’t noticed that.  Or, if you have, you were comfortable on that road, so you ignored them.

However now the game is different, you have a coach to alert you to the possibilities of change.  You change direction, ever so slightly.  You take a new road, one that diverges just a little from your original.

The first temptation maybe to think, “Huh!  Hardly worth doing.“  It may be true that the change is only a small one in the short term.  But the longer you maintain that change, further away from your original road you will travel.  After a year, you will be an entirely different country.  This will be so even if you never make another change.

The larger the change in direction, the shorter time it will take to come to new scenery.  However, even the slightest change will take you on a different journey if you persist.  You simply need to keep on the new track, even though the old one may call you back with seductive promises of familiar comforts.

“The devil you know is better than the devil you don’t know.“  But is there a devil at all on the new road?

What is the role of a coach in this process?  A coach does three things:

  1. Shows you the track you are on
  2. Points out the choices and helps you take the new road
  3. Helps you persist in maintaining that change

In general, life is a series of small decisions.  A big change is often many little changes saved up for the right moment.  Each decision we make either keeps us on the same comfortable track or takes us toward what we truly want.

Coaching helps you to make better decisions; decisions that are uniquely yours.

For a one on one preview of what coaching can do for you send an email directly to me at info@empowermax.com. Include your phone number and the best time to call.

David Martin
505.821.0157 direct
info@empowermax.com

Where do your Values come from?

Published
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David
on October 7, 2008
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“When you meet someone better than yourself, turn your thoughts to becoming his equal. When you meet someone not as good as you are, look within and examine your own self.” - Confucius

You will have gathered values all your life, starting from the day you were born, and carried some of them into adulthood.  What are they?  How did you get them?  What influence are they having on you?

Inherited values are possibly the most common.

As a child, you’ll have been influenced by what was important to your parents, siblings, extended family, teachers and group leaders.  Later on, you will have become a little more selective, adapting the values of your chosen heroes from the world of sport, fashion, film, music, politics and so on.

By the time you reached adulthood your values were already forming a major part of your adult programs.  For example, if you are always told to finish your food at meal times, you may now be eating much more than you need.  If your parents were very academic you may put a high value on acquiring formal qualifications.

Compensatory values are formed when you go to the other extreme to compensate for something which didn’t happen for you.  For example, if you had a deprived childhood you may compensate for this by overindulging your own children.

Your own judgments, or the way you perceive your own experiences will have an impact on the value you place on.  If you have ever been burgled or robbed you are likely to place a high value on security, which may or may not be appropriate in some circumstances.

On the surface these values may seem innocent enough.  However, under closer inspection it is surprising, what a major role they play in determining the way your life pants out.

When you recognize an uncomfortable tone, a feeling that all is not well, examine your values to determine whether what you are doing is violating a deeply held value.

A significant part of one on one coaching involves eliciting and creating a hierarchy of your values.  Keeping your values aligned with personal mission is critical for maintaining your motivation.

Send an email to info@empowermax.com to schedule a one on one consultation on determining your most important values.  Be sure to include your telephone number.

Show Up, Suit Up & Step Up!

David Martin
505.821.0157 direct
info@empowermax.com

Performance Special - Suit Up & Step Up!

Published
by
David
on October 1, 2008
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“I always remember an epitaph in the cemetery at Tombstone, Ariz. It says: “Here lies Jack Williams. He done his damnedest.” I think that’s the greatest epitaph a man can have.” - Harry Truman

Right now  you can jump start the process of Getting Out of Your Own Way by stepping up to Personal Breakthrough Sessions with a Master Performance Coach.  These sessions consist of three one on one phone sessions with yours truly - Speaker, Coach and certified Master of NLP.

Do you want the changes to begin now?  Or sometime early in 2009?  We both know the answer to that.

“Champions are not made in the ring they are only recognized there.” - unknown

If you read that this program consists of 3 one on one sessions, it does. EXCEPT for those who step up before I delete this post. For those “Doers” the number of sessions will double. That’s 6 one on one sessions that normally are $300 per hour. Remember, if you’re not ready that’s ok. This can be an intense process and is not for everyone, although the results are worth it.

In the mean time you can get started with the award winning audio program “Getting Out of Your Own Way!” for only $59.50 + S&H.  That’s a 40% discount from the regular price of $99.

These special offers will be up for no longet than 24 hours.  What you do for your better future is uniquely up to you.

The best is yet to come!

David Martin
505.821.0157  direct
info@empowermax.com

Stepping Up to Your Better Self

Published
by
David
on September 30, 2008
in Uncategorized
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“You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” - Mark Twain

Is your imagination out of focus?  Maybe it’s all these news stories of financial demise or political turmoil or blah, blah and more blah.

Do you want to be rid of the stress?

Do you want to feel like you have more control?

Is now the time to delcare “Enough is Eough!”

Then look inside, take that courageous step and look for the biggest reason that you are not where you want to be.  Or for the obstacles that prevent you from making the leap to the next level of success or abundance.

Would you like some guidance?  Good, then go to - Welcome to Your Better Future, and receive a 40% discount on the internationally acclaimed audio CD program “Getting Out of Your Own Way!”

Remember, the best is yet to come!

David Martin
505.821.0157 direct
info@empowermax.com

PS - The Circle of Excellence is coming this fall, stay tuned into the Performance Zone for details. This will be a 13 week course study of Personal Excellence.  Send an email to me at info@empowermax.com or call my office at 505-821-0157 for a personalized view of this program, but only if you can commit to excellence and achieving your goals.